As I sit here alone getting ready for bed, alone, I can’t help but think of how lucky I am.
First, I should mention that I’m alone tonight only because my husband is on an overnight volunteer shift with a local EMS Dept. He’s completed his EMT-I course but maintains a volunteer schedule that, at times, has him away from the home some nights and most weekends. He stays pretty busy. I should also mention how very proud I am of him. These last 5 months have been pretty taxing, for him and for me. He’s managed to work (we work at the same place) 35+ hours M-F, attend a 9 hour EMT-I class every Wednesday, pull 200+ hours of clinical hours in less than 5 months, AND maintain his volunteer commitment with the EMS Dept. Again, proud.
This brings me to why I feel so lucky.
For those who know me, you know that I’ve been a happily married woman for (this month!) 8 years. You also know that I have actually been with my gorgeous husband for over 15 years. Yes, 15 years. I met my husband in high school. You know, the tumultuous high school years where every new guy you see and meet is a conquest to be your next boyfriend? Well, after meeting him it was love at first sight and a true bond was forged from the very first minute we met. I’ll have to explain exactly how me met in another post, but for now I thought I would share my joy for my marriage, and the ever growing admiration I have for the love of my life.
My husband has been my dearest best friend since day one. I know this has been the foundation of our relationship. I honestly believe you have to be “friends” before you can be happy lovers, maybe not necessarily first, but you have to be friends. You have to actually like your husband, like you would like your friends. You can’t love unless you can like, right? I not only like my husband a whole lot, I am truly, madly, deeply in love with him. Still. Notice the reference to the song,
It was our song. I still get emotional when I hear it today, 13 years after it was released.
Next, is respect. I wholeheartedly respect my husband with everything in me. Sometimes I may not always show it, but I respect him. I respect who he is and what he stands for. He’s never wavered on changing himself for anything or anyone and that is something to be said for the times we live in today. People seem to change and adapt for reasons unknown to me. Not my husband. I love that about him. He’s exceptionally smart and impeccably capable of anything and everything he sets out to do. For that alone, I respect his innate ability to strive to be not only his very best, but the best for both of us.
Something that is a huge part of what makes us work is our ability to just be ourselves. We don’t change to suit the other. We never have. We love each other for what we are. We are comfortable enough in ourselves to not have to be something we’re not, and we don’t feel the need to hide anything from each other. Nothing. We are very open to one another. We hold nothing back. There are no secrets. There is no reason to ever feel any level of uneasiness.
We share everything. Thoughts, hopes, money, clothes, razors, socks… everything. Isn’t that what marriage is about? The joining of two into one? We love knowing that what his is mine and what’s mine is his. We wouldn’t have it any other way.
We don’t hold grudges. We don’t regret anything. We don’t argue unnecessarily. We don’t go to sleep angry. We don’t call each other names. We say “I love you” 489 times a day. We never hang up the phone without an “I love you”. We always kiss each other goodbye. We hold hands as much as possible. We actually like hanging out with one another. We aren’t jealous types. These are key elements in our happiness and success. For us anyway.
So why am I lucky? Well, I’m lucky to be in a happy, loving, caring marriage. Some can’t say they have that and that makes me sad. I honestly believe there’s someone out there for everyone. Everyone wants to find their soulmate and truly be happy for the rest of their lives – I really am lucky to not only have found my soulmate a long time ago, but still be wonderfully happy and insanely in-love all these years later.
It’s been exactly 9 minutes since I started typing this. I knew this wouldn’t take very long at all to type as I had my husband on my mind before bedtime and I knew my thoughts would just pour out.
I will leave you with this…
You, too, can be happy. You can be loved. No matter who you are, you too, deserve to have peace in your life. You are someone’s soulmate.
Marriage is work, but has a huge payout if you work at it and appreciate it for what it is.
And with that, I bid you all a pleasant goodnight.
To my wonderful husband:
I love you. These three small words have such a huge meaning and I am truly grateful to have such a wonderful husband to tell them to every day. I look forward to our continued life together and I’ll be there to hold your hand along the way. You are my shining light.